Saturday, November 10, 2007
Big Lessons from Little Kids
1. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Even when there's not a prize in the bottom of the box.
2. Sometimes it's best to be completely blunt with people, as you used to be with relatives who wanted you to do something embarrassing or tedious for a shiny quarter.
3. Asking questions is how you figure things out. Lots and lots of questions.
4. An older, wiser Gordie Lachance says in Stand By Me, "I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was 12." Lachance is right. The trick is to try to be the friend you were when you were 12: fun-loving and loyal, with no strings attached.
5. Playing is work. Approach your downtime with all the seriousness of a 5-year-old with a secret treasure map.
6. Real guys don't dip their toes in the water. They jump right in.
7. The only way to know how something works is to completely disassemble it. (This is still good advice when tackling a complex problem. Your plasma TV? Not so much).
8. There's a reason they don't give credit cards to 8-year-olds. You're supposed to save up money before you buy a new toy.
9. Your body was designed for throwing baseballs, shooting hoops, and jumping off diving boards and stuff. In the secret language of children, the word "fitness" doesn't exist. It's called "having fun."
10. Your world can be half-real and half-imaginary.
11. Homework blows. Bring work home with you and it'll ruin your night. And your marriage. And your family. And your life.
12. Too much of anything will give you a tummy ache. Like, say, bourbon.
13. If there's even the slightest doubt, hit the potty before you leave.
14. The coolest adults were the ones who took the time to listen to you. You still want to grow up to be a cool adult, right?
15. Use adrenaline as your drug of choice. You don't need beer, pot, or cigarettes to have a good time.
16. Seeing a thunderstorm roll in is better than watching HDTV. And rain isn't something to curse, but to enjoy. Hurry up, before it clears.
